i used to constantly ask myself why, why i feel this way, and that. and honestly, it helped so much, which kind of goes against everything i was about to write here. about how now im going with the flow, which yes i am, but also, i guess the true balance lies in feeling and thinking at the same time, not letting one superseed the other. which is why, its so important to look after what you put in your system, whether you’re feeding your mind or your body, because it all matters. its easier to say it doesn’t, but let’s face it, ignorance is bliss and if you choose to be aware, this bliss is worked upon, intensely. my hope for the same is that one day it will be the most natural state that i have ever experienced, and i will truly understand why,

and that day, hopefully, i will be utterly and wholly complete.

reminder: all you have is now.


your mother

what is your intention?

do you even want peace?

do you want freedom?

how are you with love?

what makes you stay awake at night?

what about truth?

how do you let yourself be weak?

do you feel at all?

who are you when the storm approaches?

how far does your mind go before you bring it back?

what fulfils your soul?

what do you seek?

what do you miss?

how do you feel?

ship to wreck

the biggest part of me is screaming out, with the sense of  profound and utter loneliness. in terms of me with myself, with the usual (its sad that it used to be so at ease that the word usual fits perfectly) connect that i feel, with my core. the higher dimensions of reaching out to more, all faded away into the mundanes of today,

with me reliving the circle of a past, and in that sense never really evolving, except in the dark,

lost and confused but a hint of clarity somewhere with some hues,

what is my intent and what do i desire

whom do i wish to be when i speak of this higher,

i have been lost, for a while now,

yet feeling like im moving in the right direction somehow,

and sometimes falling so out of track and suddenly the track is no longer here and everything is under attack

and its so strange the choices we make,

more importantly the consequences that break,

i remember this,

so thats good i guess,

intent and vibes would be honest,

with no one to help,

and here i am, writing this, trying to understand

but more than anything, i get that not again,

after this one that i rejuvenate for home’s sake,

never again really or wish upon any other dear or enemy,

none to even begin with,

exhuming love to breathe with,


and genuinely.