intention

i guess i always had cards up my sleeves. tricks waiting to be discovered, if by no-one then at least myself. but i found much to my surprise the entire deck unfolding into ways that have been more magical than i have ever imagined, or even fantasied of. this wonderful journey of knowing and not knowing as these fingers act in sync to perform actions that sing, all the while the earth turning rudimentarily while the entirety of existence finds itself on a tiptoeing scale of sorts, one of which we see the side its leaning to,

and yet, there is always the undying hope that we have. humanity. humaneness. the belief in taking that one seed out of raw unfiltered life and throwing it out into the world as it bursts and sprouts into a million like it and those that hone so much more than what is really known.

we are all on our journeys for there is a reason mine is not yours. there is a reason we are both here. and the point of it all is to find hwere you fit in this grander scheme of things and more importantly, what you can do to help. to genuinely go out of your way, or not, and help clean up this mess of energy that is fuelled nowadays by money and screams.

i see the hippie movement slowly finding its way back into the world,

and in that sense, the very sense of peace itself, is glowing and growing,

slowly but surely.

i look forward to the days that are yet to come,

i believe in the good things comin’, comin’, comin’ ❀

thank you for taking the time out for reading this! πŸ™‚

sometimes,

lately most times,

my ears ring

and why is that?

it’s simple really,

the one whom i embrace when i write, be it prose or poetry, sings,

but otherwise,

when this outlet does not arise,

i’m another one alltogether and this one doesn’t see the light

and its a mismatched irony of fleeing to fight

and its strangely all happening spontaneously inside.

 

 

anushka.

be you. be the strange mess of chaotic distress

who officially knows the life can be a rollercoaster of an absolute death,

but we live

and there are flowers that bloom on a battlefield

that do not just justify the destruction,

but proves that there’s more,

there’s resurrection,

redemption,

smiles through the wars,

feathers on top of halls,

all of it and more,

you jus thave to try,

a little harder,

to smile.

hey you, come back to me, be with my throat, caress my heart, feel my soul.

you know sometimes i have toΒ consciously remind myself to do good. to the world, to those around me, and especially, to myself.

the mind has the unique power of logically deducing why we do the things we do, including the choices we make and the actions we take. however, here, there’s always the better choice. the lesser of the two evils. at the end of the day, you learn, always, whether up or down or topsy turvy with a crown, we learn, unconditionally.

but the trick here, is to continue the learning and not fall back into old patterns,

make way for constant fresh growth,

rather than holding down all your old doors,

carve beauty out of the wood,

and travel to new lands,

and to new ‘new’ghbourhoods πŸ™‚

better late than never

It took me so so long to figure out what was wrong,

What has been wrong,

And it’s so surprising how our ideals can work so against us,

As we dive from one extreme to another.

It’s change,

It has always been change,

Sometimes the resilience sometimes the acceptance,

The fact that this world truly DOES spin madly on,

With higher infinites where there is no rule to one,

Its just the flow,

Good comes,

Good goes,

Ugly comes,

Ugly goes,

Nothing stays,

But the whole.

It’s this simple beauty that has taken me so long to understand why i have been feeling this numbness, these levels of extremes and what not.

At the same time, i TRULY believe that EVERYthing happens for a reason and so, this lesson has been very positively reinforced.

We change, life is fluid, our morals morph, we change.

Life is a waterfall,

We are drops in an ocean.

We are the ocean we are the wholesome,

We are all infinitesmall and large,

Now, small steps to the bigger picture through the tinier hologram of seeing closely,

Now,

Just now.

And so we are

There will come a time

When things settle

When you begin to effortlessly rhyme.

There will be a day

When these demons don’t stay,

In fact that fly,

Free and happy for they are not demons anymore

Fluidity has saved you,

Transience hones you,

The sunlight warms your skin and you are home,

Blue and white and beauty inside,

Thriving and blooming,

Flowers crowning their leaves,

Smiling softly,

Believe.

22:07

Sometimes you start somewhere and land up in such different and volatile spaces

The intention with which you began morphs into something much more larger than that of which you dream and so,

Work and play and names and days get intertwined

But tie the ribbon on the branch because it’s okay,

To go with the flow,

As long as it doesn’t harm you,

The traps that you resort to are hollow and so,

Fly off the wall and hold down the crude for you are whole,

Amongst such a large home,

You are going to be your own

The one that rises with no loan.

That you are,

All you’re meant to be,

That you are

Your self fulfilling prophecy.

Glowry

After so long,

You can feel the paint on your skin

And the dragonflies dance without and within,

Here I am not screaming but there’s a shout

Of a fiery like relentless mass,

F r e e,

B e a u t y,

A little prop in the walk of simmering mindtunes,

Rolling on.

downer

and before you know it,

i’m aggressive.

i want to break glass and cut hair and get piercings just to throw it in the face of the world that i am free.

but you see this freedom is a loop of its own, it requires a feed without which it would succumb,

like how snakes deflate the bodies of a number of their preys,

and balloons eventually burst though they apparently just ‘fly away’,

i’m crabby, and generally just an ass to all those around me.

ungrateful, even for luxury, whereas complimentarily, i feel that even the bare needs are blessings of beauty.

sometimes, i love feeding the ego so much, ‘just so that it will leave me alone’,

whereas in reality it just gets more hungry, and demands more,

and suddenly theres another loop that doesn’t seem to crack and when it does,

i truly do feel free.

only to start this escalation all over again,

and this, the final loop of them all,

is the one im trying to break.

to actually not want to get out of the way and walk into this castle of pride and demand my own made up prize.

Quotes from Americanah that resonate so beautifully <3

He had begun to feel bloated from all he had acquired – the family, the houses, the cars, the bank accounts – and would, from time to time be overcome with the urge to prick everything with a pin, to deflate it all, to be free.
She had, finally, spun herself fully into being.
You are hungry and honest, that is very rare in this county.
His backbone was softened by duty.
Remember this is our newly middle-class world. We haven’t completed the first cycle of prosperity, before going back to the beginning again, to drink milk from the cow’s udder.
With no power comes no responsibility.
There was something immodest about her modesty: it announced itself.
If you’re uncomfortable about asking questions, then say you are uncomfortable about asking questions and ask them anyway. It’s easy to tell when a question is coming from a good place.
She was taking two sides at once, to please everyone, she always chose peace over truth.
To call him humble was to make rudeness normal.
Because Kimberly’s repeated apologies were tinged with self-indulgence, as though she believed that she could, with apologies, smooth all the scalloped surfaces of the world.
And he was the kind of man who took but did not give.
She was too afraid to hope, now that it seemed possible.
There was something in him, lighter than ego but darker than insecurity, that needed he constant buffing, waxing and polishing.
Do things begin to exist only when they are names?
These people, they make you aggressive just to hold your dignity.
He was like a salutary tonic: with him, she could only inhabit a higher level of goodness.
She thought of him as a person who did not have a normal spine but had, instead, a firm reed of goodness.
We have confidence but no dignity.
Here she felt that anything could happen, a ripe tomato could burst out of solid stone.
Ifemelu liked the name of the town, Willow, it sounded to her like freshly squeezed beginnings.